You're so nebulous sometimes
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
