hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
