3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
