East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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