I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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