Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
