is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
