we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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