i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
