I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize