The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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