it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Sorry about my life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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