Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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