Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
