how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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