Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
