for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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