he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Semen is not good for contacts.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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