I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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