Tell her she can't have a vagina
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize