If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
