If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize