yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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