playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize