Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
