Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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