Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
