using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
