Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
