One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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