i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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