so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
