we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize