"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Randomize
