Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
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asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
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Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.