I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
