South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
