i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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