that's an acceptable place to lick
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
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I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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