I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
