dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I love you. Go after that dick
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Randomize
