I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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