I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize