Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
