Sponge bath it is.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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