conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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