how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
