CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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