Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Please, let me fuck your mom
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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