i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
